I HAD AN AWESOME TIME: Insert Witty Tiger Woods "Driver" Joke Here

The past three days I've been hunkered down in my apartment trying to beat a winter cold into submission with lots of hot tea and Sudafed before the holiday party season commences this weekend. I'll admit to being a total couch potato on Monday and plowing through all the shows on my DVR, but yesterday and today I've kept the TV off for the most part and have focused on listening to recently acquired remastered albums by Judas Priest (7 total), Kiss (4 total) and Journey (2 total) along with a few other older releases by Lou Reed, Into Another and Bathory as well as spinning some 2009 releases that I wanted to hear again from the likes of A.F.I., Future Of The Left, The Noisettes, Brand New, Them Crooked Vultures, Wolfmother and Lucero. While listening to music is of course a delightful endeavor (in most cases), I did find the need to take time to multi-task while listening to it and do things like online shopping for Christmas gifts, write blogs and partake in one of my favorite hobbies: keeping up on current events.

[I'm going to apologize for the lack of eloquence in this rant in advance as I am a bit loopy from a combination of Sudafed and lack of sleep, but hopefully my point will come across somewhat coherently.] Unless you have been living under a rock the past few days, then you, like the rest of the world, are well aware of the fact that professional golfer Tiger Woods had a car accident a few days ago which has subsequently led to rumors of him having cheated on his wife. I understand that someone as well known as Tiger Woods getting in a very suspect looking car accident and then details emerging that perhaps it was because he was attempting to get away from his nine iron wielding wife are going to pique the public's curiosity, but the attention the media is giving it is well beyond the point of good taste. Honestly, I shouldn't be shocked considering these are the same folks that felt Britney Spears shaving her head was headline worthy, but I simply cannot help but continue to be disgusted by the fact that celebrity gossip that was once relegated to more appropriate media channels like TMZ, OK!, US Weekly, The National Enquirer, etc., etc. is now considered essential coverage by the major news outlets.

I'll pick on CNN because they are one of the worst offenders. Here is their current headline listing:

Latest news

Granted, there are some interesting and relevant news stories listed here, but honestly I do not come to CNN to read about who Hulk Hogan is banging or revelations that the mom from Family Ties is gay or that Facebook has added new privacy features. And for foooooook's sake...Susan Boyle? Really? I mean for the love of all that is holy, they couldn't find something more NEWSWORTHY to write about? A human interest story about a non-celebrity (although, I guess arguably Susan Boyle could fall under this category)? A fire department getting a kitten out of a tree? Something? Anything?

Tiger Woods cheated on his wife. People are outraged. You know why? Because people are stupid. As I type this, do you know how many married men and women are out there right now schtupping someone that isn't their spouse? More than any of us could probably guess. I'm not condoning cheating at all, but a celebrity stepping out on their spouse is not more important than the fact that Obama is about to deploy 30,000 more troops to Afghanistan or that the New York state Senate killed a bill today that would have legalized same-sex marriage in the state or that some psychopath in Cleveland killed 11 women and buried them in his yard. And spare me the role model argument...they are people too and therefore imperfect.

It is easy to solely blame the media for this, but the fact of the matter is that the public shares in the blame because they eat it up and keep the cycle rolling. As much as it pains me to say it, I do have to applaud Fox News for taking a stand against our celebrity obsessed culture and for the most part keeping their headlines to harder news. Of course they do still cover the celebrity stuff because that is what the sheep demand, but at least they don't make it front and center like the majority of their peers.

Poor Tiger Woods had sex with a really hot cocktail waitress and now his really hot model wife is mad at him and we all want to watch. How about we all f off and leave them alone while he and his wife try to explain to their kid (yes, they have more than one, but the baby is obviously too young to know what is going on) what is happening and let them work this out on their own. We would all want the same privacy if our personal lives were in turmoil. Nobody likes someone meddling in their business now do they?

Anyway, didn't I say something about Judas Priest, Kiss and Journey earlier?

Judas Priest "Devil's Child"